Ahhh, I’ll Do It Tomorrow
Posted on | April 5, 2010
The nature of my procrastination can only come from a place of genetics because there’s no explicable reason why my motto is, “Put off today what you can do next week!”
I mean, really, I have no idea as to the why I push things, events and essays away like rancid shrimp on serving tray. Even when I think I’m on the ball I end up scrambling at the last minute to get things done.
Bills are the worst. Even when I think I’m caught up with them I end up getting a phone call surprising me with the total amount still owed. I feel shamed and I just know they’re rolling their and thinking what a loser I am.
There HAS to be some explanation! I can’t possibly be as lazy or addle minded as might be perceived. I mean I feel like I’m constantly on the move.
Focus.
Yes, that horrible word that I’ve heard before all too many times1 has become the other “F” word in my life. I’ve looked into it and I’m pretty much convinced I’m not a victim of the oft prescribed A.D.D. That dreaded acronym that ends up defining you and seems to become the excuse of every lost thought.
I once dated a guy who was diagnosed with the “condition” -as he used to call it. Every unpaid bill that resulted in a disconnection of services came with a shaking of the head and a muffled curse, “Damned A.D.D.”
Could it be that medication is that all that’s required to get my lazy ass to write this damned assignment?
I’m not really selling my good points here, am I? If this was a dating service I’d be eternally single. The fat guy sitting in front of his computer eating Kraft Dinner and watching Star Trek: Voyager episodes on line.
Oh shit!
Forget that last part.
It’s the shiny stuff that grabs my attention. The easy way out. If it’s a choice between homework or watching a movie, movie wins most of the time. If I’m in a bar and there’s a video screen2 I’ll barely tune into the live conversation I’m having. It’s very frustrating for me and for the person I’m unintentionally ignoring.
“Yeah, no, that’s good.
“What do you mean it’s good? I just told you I lost my job!”
“No, I heard you. Go with the red one.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
(Pause, regaining eye contact) “I’m sorry, what? The scrolling on CNN. Fuckin’ Republicans. Now where were we?”
It’s not on purpose mind you. I’m sure it’s a disease or condition or even handicap. You pick the word, I just know it’s not my fault.
Well, not entirely.
I’d love to finish this but I have to ignore my homework some more and watch the news.
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